Please keep in mind that many of the following quotes are taken out of context, be it for comedic effect or out of necessity. Take all of them with a grain of salt and bear in mind they don't necessarily reflect their originators' views and opinions. That being said, if you find any quote to be particularly awful, please notify the moderator of your choice to have its removal evaluated.
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#175
I have a bunch of dents in my forehead, and at least 2 of them I remember the stories behind.
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Alex
[2015-04-29]
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#174
I have literally decreased the cost of life.
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Paul
[2015-04-06]
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#173
Why does everybody keep coming on to me?
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Paul
[2015-04-06]
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#172
It's just like a warm toilet seat.
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Cori
[2015-04-28]
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#171
I'll leave it on the love nugget.
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Beej
[2015-04-28]
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#170
420 yoloswag I win the game!
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Beej
[2015-04-28]
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#169
You've killed Ian. — What a relief.
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Heather and Beej
[2015-04-28]
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#168
Alright kids, what did we learn today? That's right, never trust Kathleen!
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Alex
[2015-04-28]
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#167
We vegetarians appreciate the fact that you don't resent us.
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Cameron
[2015-04-19]
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#166
You *sshole! You made my skull pizza escape.
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Cameron
[2015-04-19]
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#165
There is an awful lot of torsos down here.
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Cameron
[2015-04-19]
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#164
I didn't get to where I am in this game, i.e. making no progress ever, by being cautious.
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Cameron
[2015-04-19]
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#163
I don't like murdering men in wheelchairs… but sometimes it's useful to do so.
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Cameron
[2015-04-19]
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#162
Could I just start injecting my thigh directly with vodka?
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Cameron
[2015-04-16]
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#161
It seems a bit presumptuous to worry about my mental health as I wander through this city murdering people for no apparent reason.
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Cameron
[2015-04-16]
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#160
A capacity to feel terror is really at the core of who I am.
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Cameron
[2015-04-16]
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#159
I'm not very good at this game. But I will yell at it more than most people. So, I hope you are entertained.
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Cameron
[2015-04-16]
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#158
If your hair is wrong, your entire life is wrong.
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Cameron
[2015-04-16]
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#157
Pee in my cube!
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Alex
[2015-04-24]
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#156
I take instructions from other people like orangutans take typing lessons.
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Kathleen
[2015-04-22]
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#155
Nobody wants to poop in the dark.
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Heather
[2015-04-22]
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#154
He's like a vending machine. You insert bullets and death falls out.
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Alex
[2015-04-21]
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#153
According to McDonald's official canon…
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Graham
[2015-04-23]
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#152
That's not how roads work! You can't do that!
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James
[2015-04-23]
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#151
James accidentally turned on the XBox with his face.
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Graham
[2015-04-23]